Deep Thought

What to do I could go home and pick up after my families mess or I can stay upstate at school and work for the summer? I miss home but I need a break and everytime I go home I need to help everyone and fix every problem and im tired I need to figure out what im going to do with myself, my future is in question right now and I just want to find the answers to my life my future. I used to be so sure about what I wanted to do with my become an RN then go on to be a midwife and deliver babies for the rest of my life. But now im not so sure is it because everythings going wrong with classes or because im meant to help people in other ways.I guess I will figure it out soon I hope.

Future?

Okay so I have completed two years of college, I am currently a Health studies major trying to get into the nursing program at utica college. I m taking one of my a and p classes over this summer because i didnt get the grade i needed for the class. I need to take one more also so i dont know if i will be able to get in the program. I f i dont get into the program i dont know what im going to do with myself because this is the only thing i want to be a nurse the only thing in my life that will never hurt me only make me a better person through different experiences everyday. The last time i spoke to the nursing director she told me to think about changing my major but i cant if i gradute as a health studies major where will i get a job at no i cant do that. i need security. i need to know that soon as i gradute that i will find a job,college is hard enough to graduate and not know what to do. I want to dissappoint myself and my family they are countingon meand i cant let them down. Everytime I think about my future and how its at question right now i think about how in middle school i wanted to be a chef. But there werent culinary high schools yet they came out once i had gotten to high school already. i love helping people and i fell in love with birth during a high school internship in the hospital. I love making people happy,helping them feel better through care,soothing food, and a good pep talk.i currently need a pep talk.
My question to self sometimes is : is everything going wrong with nursing because i need to rechase my past dream of being a chef?

Hitting the floor

As i walk into my room tonight I'm lending my RA my duffel bag while she goes to the city this weekend and as i give her the bag my roommate falls completely off her bed with her comforter. I stare in astonishment because she hit the floor so hard and she didn't get up she just comfortable on the floor so i knew she was okay.she must of been drinking or something i guess she will just tell me tomorrow but funny thing is this morning when we woke up she asked me had i ever woken up feeling like somebody beat me up. What a night heading to bed need to be up early tomorrow no skipping the gym,slacked off a little today.Good night!

6/23/2010 = Simple

Today woke up to late to go to the gym have class from 12-2 then work ,update my boss on what i have completed i need to study for 2 exams i have next week and i need to take a long walk to substitute not going to the gym this morning. Tomorrow have to get to the gym and i also stopped smoking cigarretts so this has not been an easy journey but im getting through this one day at a time.
Highs= i have lost 8 pounds yayy since may 25,got the highest test grade in my lab class
Lows= just missing home

More Hot Summer

Just sitting waiting for friends to get back from there third ride on the Tilt N Twirl

Just loved the vintage look of the place to cute

Fun at Sylvan Beach

Just went to the rides the beach upstate is more like a lake with sand.

me after spring '10 semester

First posting me at 232 lb